KNOW the Pre-Marital Sex

Last night I was chatting with one of my female friends with usual banters and she suddenly got into how interesting her relationship's become with her new found boy-friend. When I further asked whether she had met the perfect husband in him, she said far from it. And she obviously is not the first person in my circle to say so. With widespread availability of contraceptives and condoms the times have definitely changed. One doesn't have to deal with issues revolving sex any more. Though it is still strongly frowned upon in the Islamic culture, Hindu culture is slowly opening up to it knowing there is no way out. I for one am completely for it.

Marriages earlier was about finding the perfect mate in terms of financial security and social status. These parameter are hardly applicable these days. They have forayed one step further and now seek suitability in emotional, physical as well as sexual sense. They rarely have marriage on their cards every time they dive into a relationship. A lot of it has got to do with how empowered the women have become and ready to embrace the changing times.

There are basically three issues against Pre-Marital Sex:
 1. Related immorality.

What moral values should bind a person more than the freedom of the individual? Doesn’t everyone have the right to pleasure and seek for it accordingly? The conservatives still believe it is against their culture. Most of the cultures have faded away with time, because the cultures only suited the specific chronological frames they were developed in and in the same way sexual arrest doesn’t fit the frames of today. Though there are groups openly accepting of it like the Muria people of Madhya Pradesh who are the clear exceptions with their willingness to move forward without compromising their traditions but just making necessary modifications.

2. Encourages sexual violations.

They are far from related, the statistics clearly state that such sexual violations have been consistently higher in rural areas than they have been in cities which is to say that women seeking out for a sexual partner or even having a random pre-marital sex is no harm to their safety. It’s when they are too loud about it that men from the more narrow minded back drops misunderstand and take advantages which is hardly the case because most of the times they very well know the waters they are treading.
   

      3. Sexually transmitted diseases and unplanned pregnancies.

In earlier times when sexually transmitted diseases were prevalent it was an acceptable reason but with the current generation being over whelmed with awareness there shouldn't be any fear as such to devoid the youth of the carnal pleasure. With the median age of marriage getting higher every year it is the least they can do to vent out their stiff monotonous life and feel the purest form of relaxation. Sex should be seen as an act of nature and pleasure without adding too much stakes on it.

Having said all that, they should not go out of hand. Young teens as early as 15 have faced pregnancies in our country. According to a 2001 UNICEF survey, in 10 out of 12 developed nations with available data, more than two thirds of young people have had sexual intercourse while still in their teens. Our country is not far behind, and we should be far, because the potentially adventurous adolescent life should not be invaded by the loop of sexual thirst only to later feel dissatisfied with life and resort to hopeless ways of managing the situations of self loathe. On the other hand sex education programs should be made more rigorous to make it safe and shed off the sexual shyness of the generation. Bottom line is: "no sex" is not necessary if you "know sex".

The word “Balance” like everywhere plays an important role here. One must know exactly how much is too much and at the same time not cage oneself to the age old theories of righteousness but explore with downright safety if it is on the course instead of consciously sniffing it out. After all how is any act wrong, if neither of the involved are harmed and on the contrary only pleased to the utmost satisfaction? On the ending note I would like to quote the very apt Oscar Wilde statement:

“I have no objection to anyone’s sex life as long as they don’t practice it in the street and frighten the horses.”